"Having Faith when Life Is "Real"

I remember learning in freshman religion class in college about three components to faith: 1) knowledge-- learning about something or someone, 2) assent- to that knowledge or obedience, and 3) trust- relying or depending on that something or someone completely. We read and discussed Paul Tillich's Dynamics of Faith, which spoke of total allegiance to a Wholly Other God. I think all of the eighteen year olds in my class in the fall of 1970 agreed that the hardest "dynamic of faith" was trusting. However, even as some of our brothers and sisters were fighting and ding in Viet Nam, very few of us had faced the harsh realities of life that made trusting in God difficult.

During the more than a century that intervened I had some experiences that made trusting in God hard. Early on there were the deaths of my grandparents shortly after I completed seminary. Later, we faced some challenging economic times in the inflation of the early eighties. Still, even with a limited first call pastor salary of $10,000 or so and my wife attending graduate school while raising two young children, we were optimistic. When our own parents experienced illnesses such as cancer and heart surgeries, it was a little more challenging. As the century closed, we still had the cushion that we had all four parents. There is something about the generation in front of you being intact that reinforces your faith. "Real" life does not fully hit.

National and international forces also played a role in challenging my trust in God. In the 1990's I remember seeing the night shots of bombs going off in Iraq. Although those shots were a challenge to my confidence in human nature, it seemed so remote and I felt we were on the "righteous" side. During the early part of the 2000's we experienced the tragedy of 9/11/2001. I remember looking up at the sky later that night at the lights of planes overhead, and thinking maybe something bad could happen to us in suburban Chicago. It made world events seem more real. The second bombing of Iraq, though far more controversial, made me doubt my confidence in my country, but not in God.

This century brought the deaths of all four parents and my younger brother. My daughters both had serious health issues, but they came through them better than ever. Still, faith in God is what brought me through it. It was not until a recent diagnosis and surgery that the "rubber hit the road" for me. As I am current recuperating, I realize how when totally "real" life happens, you hold on to the promises of God that you have heard throughout your life. You do an inventory of your life, but even after doing so, you know that your faith depends on the same gracious God that brought you into this world, and to whom you surrender your life no matter what happens-- in this life and the next. I really realize that the journey of life brings me back to the kind of trust I had as a child as my father would throw me up and catch me, or when he would carry me into the house halfway asleep from the car.

Feeling God's grace with me now as I continue to walk my journey of faith, I look for ways in which I can further contribute. Our living out our faith at all times must be as real and genuine as life gets to be from time to time along. May those of us who have trusted in God to bring us through serious challenges, but have emerged well, share all that faith means with others. That lesson is to trust in the One who has our back no matter what how "real" life gets.